Meditation has been a part of my life for many years now. Not in a dramatic, life-changing, movie-like way. It entered quietly, slowly, and over time it became something I kept returning to again and again.
Over the years, I have tried many different kinds of meditation. Some came through yoga training, some through retreats, some through curiosity, and some simply through phases of life where the mind was searching for something deeper.
And yet, even after practicing for years, I kept noticing something strange.
We read so much about meditation. We read about techniques, methods, benefits, brain scans, spiritual experiences, and enlightenment. But very rarely does anyone talk about what actually happens inside the mind and body while practicing.
Where exactly does the transformation happen? How do we feel it?
How do we know we are progressing?
How do we know we are doing it right?
Nobody really talks about this part. This section of my blog is my attempt to explore that space.
Why I Wanted to Start Writing About Meditation Experiences?
In the yoga philosophy section of my blog, I mostly share teachings, ideas, and reflections rooted in traditional texts and philosophy.
But meditation feels different. Meditation is not theory. Meditation is not intellectual.
Meditation is deeply personal.
And many times, meditation is confusing.
There were phases when I felt calm. There were phases when I felt restless. There were times when meditation felt beautiful and meaningful, and there were times when it felt boring, frustrating, or completely pointless.
Yet something kept pulling me back.
This is why I wanted to start this meditation journal. Not as a guide, not as a teacher, not as an expert. Simply as someone who has been sitting with her own mind for many years and wants to share what that journey has actually felt like.
Meditation Is Not As Straightforward As We Think
Most of us grow up believing meditation is a technique.
Sit straight, close your eyes, focus on breath, don’t think….
But when we actually sit down to meditate, we realise how little we understand about what is happening.
We start asking questions like, “Am I doing it right?” “Why is my mind more restless now?”
Why am I feeling emotional? Why is my body reacting in strange ways?
Is this progress or am I going backwards?
We are taught how to do meditation. But we are rarely told how meditation feels. And this gap creates doubt.
There Is No Fixed Way Of Doing Meditation
One of the biggest shifts in my understanding came when I truly reflected on what Patanjali says about meditation.
According to the Yoga Sutras, meditation is not something we practice. It is something that happens as a result of practice.
The sutra says:
“Tatra pratyayaikatanata dhyanam.”
Translation
Meditation is the continuous flow of one thought.
Patanjali explains that when the mind learns to hold one point of focus, that stage is called Dharana, concentration. When that same flow continues effortlessly for a longer duration, it becomes Dhyana, meditation. This changes everything.
It means meditation is not a technique. Meditation is a state. Meditation is an outcome.
Meditation is something that happens when the mind becomes ready. So what are we actually practicing all these years. We are preparing the mind. We are training attention. We are creating the conditions in which meditation can happen. This also means there is no single fixed way of doing meditation. There are many doors that lead toward the same room.
And this is something nobody talks about enough.
What This Meditation Section Will Be
In this section, I want to share my experiences with different meditation practices I have explored over the years.
Not as instructions, not as promises, not as guarantees.
Just honest reflections on how it felt, what shifted, what confused me, what surprised me, and what truly stayed with me. My hope is that when you read these experiences, you may feel less confused about your own journey. Because sometimes, the most comforting thing is knowing that someone else has sat through the same silence, the same restlessness, the same questions.
And this is where I would like to begin.
In the next post, I will start with my experience of Vipassana meditation.
📩 🕉️